Let’s revive this, shall we?
For starters, we’re 25 days away from the wedding!
It’s currently the last day of the long Chinese New Year weekend, and I’ve spent the whole day chilling in my new room (uhh, I mean OUR new room) watching TV shows and being a couch potato. But for the last week, I’ve been busy preparing the invitation cards for my reception. More on that soon!
The question I get asked the most now that it’s less than a month away is: How are you feeling?
My response will usually be-
“Yeah I’m okay…”
Many think that I’m nervous, busy (I am, actually. But I’ll get to that in a second), running amok, being a… BRIDEZILLA. Well, so far, Praises to God, I’m still as lepak as I set out myself to be when I first started my #TSLEPAKBRIDESERIES.
(Sans the beer. But replace that with bubble tea! Fav order: KOI Peach Green Tea 25% with pearls #justsayin)
I still have wedding errands to run, but I treat them like meetings and appointments. I try my best not to fixate on things that are beyond my control.
If there’s anything that wedding has taught me, it is to trust the will of my Creator. Saying that, thinking that, praying to tell the Almighty that, is a cure for all worries.
Now, moving on to the state at which how busy I am at the moment. But first, I’ve been asking the people around me this question: If you didn’t know who I was in real life and from social media, do you think would know that I’m getting married in a month?
Many said no! I personally find it quite funny and interesting.
The reason why I think this is so, is because I don’t have time to freak out over small details pertaining to the wedding. Because I’m taking a long marriage leave, I have to prepare content that’s due to be published while I’m away. For example, it’s February now, but I need to get the March content up and ready to go before I leave for my break. With that said, the only time I get to be a bride-to-be is when I get home from work, or after work. When I get up and head to work, I’m in work mode, and I have no time to have a bride-to-be brain, or think like a bride-to-be. Thinking like a bride-to-be mostly refers to paying attention, and fixating on small details that actually don’t really matter that much (lol).
In retrospect, I’m kind of glad that I’m being kept busy at work, because I leave less time to freak out and fall into the bridezilla trap. Another reason why is also because the Lad and I had two years to plan our wedding. I’m grateful because we both agreed not to leave things at the last minute. So really, 25 days to the wedding, and most of the things regarding the wedding has already been settled.
The time when I really feel like I’m getting married is when I’m alone- On the way to and home from work, being at home alone on a weekend, or when my mind just wanders. This is when I feel like, “Oh my God, I’m getting married.”
It’s a whole other experience. It’s an exciting occasion, and I’m looking forward for our nikah. But on the other hand, I will no longer be under the care of my Dad. Being an only child… Is really different. Thinking about all these changes sometimes makes me emotional. The thought of having to be a wife, is pretty scary too because I don’t know how much of a good wife I will or can be (Basically 25 days to perfect my #domesticgoddess skills).
But yes, when alone time is over, I snap back into my normal self and do what I have to do for the day. Because if I keep harping on it, and thinking about it, I’ll just end up sitting down pondering and not accomplishing anything.
And lastly, one thing that I hope to be better at before I get married, is to be closer to my Creator. Not going to deny it, but I’ve been feeling very distant from Him. And with that said I need to mend my heart, and work harder to be closer to the Almighty. Because without Him, all of this would not and will not be possible. I only have Him to thank for everything, and Him to turn to for everything.
God Willing, everything will work out nicely and I pray that our nikah and walimah will be filled with lots of love and barakah.
I’ll be updating more on here (I hope)!