Ola! Happy 2016 everybody!
To kickstart 2016 here on my blog, I thought I’d share the 13 things I’ve learnt and come to realise in 2015.
1 . Even those close to you can hurt you… A lot.
While everyone would assume that family, and people who’re close to you in general, would always have your back. Technically that’s how it should be. But as humans, we all change. We all find other things that drive us towards whatever it is that we want to achieve. Intentions can be good, but the execution is crucial.
2. “To err is human; to forgive, divine.”
Forgiveness is encouraged. But it’s the most difficult thing to do. How, and where do you draw the line on forgiving, but at the same time ensuring that your head doesn’t get stepped on- over and over again? I’ve come to learn that forgiving is not a sign of weakness, it’s a sign that you need to let go so that it won’t eat you up inside anymore.
3. Words are just words- until you put it into action.
Apologies mean nothing if you’re not going to put in the effort to fix the boo boo that you made. Address things accordingly with reference to the scale of the problem.
4. Envy (and ego) is a sickness of the heart.
Get rid of it. Get off your high horse (if you are on one). You’re not perfect- nobody is.
5. Respect has to be earned, not demanded.
6. Priorities change when you’re planning to build and start a life with somebody.
I’ve had to hold back on my makeup and beauty quests because I have to set aside funds for mine and the Lad’s wedding. I’ve had to sacrifice getting things I want because I want to get married to my best friend more than I want five of the Charlotte Tilbury Lipsticks.
7. Be grateful for everything “Syukur Selalu“
Following #6, I’m grateful that I have a supportive husband-to-be, who sees how passionate I am about what I’m passionate about, who sees the things I go through every day, who listens to every complaint I have on a day to day basis about work, and who just told me at the end of December, “Get that bag you’ve wanted for so long. You deserve it.”
I’m grateful for my parents, whom I know will always be there to listen to my rants about life, and the annoyances I face everyday. I’m grateful for the existence of my closest friends.
I’m grateful for difficult times I’ve faced in 2015- some that made me cry, some that made me want to punch a wall, some that made me want to give up.
8. “Verily in the remembrance of Allah do hearts find rest.”
In the midst of all that was happening in 2015, I lost focus. I didn’t feel calm, I was consumed by anger day in and day out. I was consumed by unhappiness every. Single. Day. The only time I felt happy was when I was at home, with my parents, with my fiancé, with my friends, when I was writing articles, when I was filming and editing videos. I can safely say that in 24 hours, I hated 50% of it.
So I started taking deep breaths more, doing dzikir more, and appreciating the special time I had with God five times a day. I took that mere five minutes each time out of my worldly life, to just collect myself and let all the unhappiness go. Alhamdulillah, I got better. I felt calmer, and at peace.
Some days are harder than others, but I do have to give myself a pat on the back for getting it this far.
10. You will falter.
Because you’re human. When you do, it’s God’s way of telling you, “I’m here! I’m here to listen to you!” So when you feel that way,
11. Never stop fighting for what you want to do in life
People will take advantage of you. They’ll make you feel lousy. They’ll make you feel like you’re incapable of a lot of things. They’ll make you feel like you’ve done a huge mistake that is irreversible. You’ll probably tank it in. But there comes a time, when you have to learn to use the word “No” and make it a sentence.
This year I also managed to feel the power of a red lipstick and/or bright lipsticks. It always seems to perk up my day. When I wear a red lipstick, I literally feel I can conquer the world. I’m a lipstick hoarder/lover/addict anyway, so anytime I get a new lipstick or wear a new shade on a new day, I’ll feel really happy anyway so. Heh.
2015 was one of the toughest years I’ve had in a while. But despite all of it I think the love I have around me outweighs all the negativity that has been thrown at my face. I got engaged to my best friend, I’ve gotten closer to my girl friends despite our clashing schedules, I’ve managed to maintain friendships even when some of my friends are not in Singapore, I have a YouTube channel with amazing subscribers who I really am appreciative of, and today, I’m happy to say, that In Shaa Allah, I’ll finally be able to do what I love for a living.
I take these 13 things as lessons for me to be aware of myself and ensure that I don’t do the mean things that have been done to me, to other people. I’m in no way trying to pin point anybody and if somehow you feel like I’m talking about you, then that’s how you perceive it. This is the thing with my writing-
“I’m responsible for what I say (or write), but I’m not responsible for how you perceive it.”
Your perception is beyond my control. Like I said, I take these as lessons for myself; as reminders.
To wrap this post up, no matter who you are, or where you’re at in your life, I hope that you will turn the negative parts of 2015 and turn it into positive goals and thoughts that you can use as experience and learning points as you move along into 2016. I hope 2016 would be filled with more love, life and laughter for all of us.
Happy 2016 everybody. May the (positive) force be with you (Can you tell I’m on a Star Wars kick?)