Throughout my first year in poly, you guys have been there to watch me grow, make mistakes, and hurt myself. I shall not divulge anything that is not supposed to be exposed to every one of you. Let’s just say that things have happened. And it’s these things that have influenced me to make my decision to distant myself. I believe that not all of you have made me feel this way. It’s just certain bad apples that have ruined my outlook on cliques like us. (If it still exists.)
I shall admit to a few things. I admit that I’m not a perfect person. I have made my share of mistakes. I have made my share of self- involved statements that might have thrown many of you off. You don’t have to tell me, I know. I know I’ve done or said some things I shouldn’t have- things that might have hurt your feelings or made you angry. I sincerely apologise from the bottom of my heart.
In general, friends are supposed to be there through rain or shine, good mood, bad mood. Face it; everyone has his or her flaws and imperfections. As a friend, we should accept their flaws without making it a problem. I just don’t want to hang around with people who have issues with me, not tell me about it, and make my flaws a huge problem to them. But on the outside, they act like nothing happened.
I know some may think, I should go up and say this to you guys myself. I made that mistake. The reason was that I didn’t want any business with whoever was involved. However, I didn’t realize that the business was the people involved themselves. They were the problem. And if I had to solve it, I should’ve settled it with them. The only difference here is, you guys, as a whole, are not a problem to me.
Nevertheless, the effects of the incident taught me a lot of things. I’d like to thank them because it made me be a better person. It made me realized what I lacked, and where I can improve myself. Most importantly, it made me stronger.
I will remember the conversation till the day I die. Sounds really exaggerated, but it’s true. If a person really wanted an apology, that was not the way to have gone to get it. Still, telling the reasons why will be a violation of the deal so I’ll just stop here.
Thanks for those who have been there for me through it all. Again, I’m sorry if I have ever hurt any one of your feelings in any way. I take back what I said when about wasting a year making friends with you. I’d rather rephrase that. “I learnt alot from what has happened. I didn’t waste the year, but it certainly showed me many things.”
I’m making this about me again. Sorry.
And yah, the basic point of this is cos I, as a person, would want to start this holy month with a clean heart. I’m sure all of you would want that too. I pray that all of us will find a little space in our heart to put this behind us and start with a clean slate. Doesn’t matter if things are not as what it used to be. I’m fine. I just want to clear my conscience.
I’m sure you guys will remain tight till the end of your years in poly. It’s been a very interesting ride with you guys. It definitely had its share of life lessons and experiences. I am grateful for that. All the best in your second year, yo. I hope you guys will be blessed with happiness and good results. Happy fasting to the Muslims.
I know. I’m pathetic. No friends. Kinda aimless and bitter. Blah Blah. The choice is yours.
But, There- the thing up top.
I’m done. Are you?